Fear grips you like death. It’s like a WWE, Stone Cold Steve Austin elbow drop…it’s a stunner. It chokes happiness and stifles growth. But fear has a weakness, just like Superman. Its kryptonite is love, encouragement, support, understanding, and even unexpected help from a stranger.

When was the last time you felt afraid? I mean knees buckling, lips quivering, unequivocal fear. I can still clearly remember a time when I tried to get up the courage to ride a roller coaster with my son. My knees actually buckled just before we were about to board. I had to hang onto the rail in order to maintain my balance and confess to my kid that I was too afraid to get on. I was angry at myself for not being able to go through with it and was afraid I had let my son down and defeated the entire purpose of taking him to an amusement park. Not wanting to completely give up, I took a chance and asked the family next to us if they would mind if my son rode with them. After being reassured he was in good hands, I took the walk of shame back to all the other parents who knew not to even try getting on. This family let my son ride with them not just once, but even asked if he would like to go again (and of course he said yes)!

I’ve learned that it’s okay to be afraid. Sometimes you can overcome your fear, and other times you may have to fall back on Plan B. Recently, I ran into my old frenemy fear. I spent countless days and nights working on a self-reflection journal that I really wanted to create. I was so excited when the first official copy arrived-I did it!! Then fear reared its ugly head. I started to worry that it wasn’t good enough. What if I get bad reviews? What if nobody buys it? Mentally, my knees had buckled. For nearly a month I did nothing. I suddenly noticed others announcing their journals. Wow, someone was sharing and enthusiastic about the very path I had been led to take, but no one knew since I was too terrified to tell anyone about my journal.

Fear is like a train. When we are led by the spirit of faith and courage, we eagerly get on board. As soon as fear grips us, we scramble to exit at the next stop. But guess what, the train keeps on going. Once fear sets in, you go from being on the right track to standing on the sidelines. Yup, life moves on while you are paralyzed by fear. Sometimes we need the support of our friends and family to help us get unstuck. God will even send total strangers to help you. The kind family that intervened and helped with my son wasn’t sent to help me get over my fear of heights…they were sent to help me get through it. Side note: I’ve been afraid of heights since I was a kid, and I’ve been forced several times to ride roller coasters to “help me get over my fear”, which has really caused more trauma. On that day, my goal was to fulfill my son’s desire to visit an amusement park. My child had a terrific day thanks to that wonderful couple, who stood in the gap for me where I was unable to.

Through my new journal, Girl, Get Out Your Head: A Daily Reflection Activity Journal, I hope to help those who, like me, often become stuck in life’s uncertainties and everyday challenges. We can’t always force ourselves to get over it. Sometimes we have to use a backup plan and outside supports to get through it. Like that family, I want this journal to embrace where you are at the moment and stand in the gap so you can have a better day.